Spats. Tiffs. Fights. Matches. We all have a different name for all those all too common occurrences in marriage. Not one of us is immune from these episodes, the reason being, we are different. We think differently and react differently. If someone were to tell me that they had a 'perfect' marriage and that they never fought because they saw eye -to-eye all the time, they are either conic liars or severely dislusional.

I can honestly say from week to week, my husband and I do not see eye-to-eye. Minumal 3 times a week. It also depends on the subject matter. You could usually bet that I will be more conservative and for him to be carefree. This does not mean we do not come down to an understanding and agree. Just that most of the time my view is completely different from his.

Does this aggravate me? Yes and no. Yes, because we disagree on the most ridiculous things. For example: The oil in the car needs to be changed this week. I usually have him call to make an appointment and he will take it in. He makes the appointment every time and forgets to take it in. He thinks it is okay and never thinks twice about. He will call another place next time. I disagree because it needs to be done now and that company relies on us for business. As a business owner, keeping your appointments is what keeps the money rolling in.

On the flip side, no. No, because the more we disagree, the better I get to see eye-to-eye...next time. I enjoy being able to learn new things about my husband. It helps me better understand how he thinks and how he will react to something I might say next. Just like any relationship we all have said something that made the other person go through the roof. But if you had the chance to talk it out and seek too understand their point-of-view, then all will be more clear for all future disagreements.

You know how you feel right before you meet you boyfriend for dinner. Sometimes when your meeting a business partner for the first time. Or even going to a job interview praying and hoping for the best outcome-the job! I have the jitters. Even though I do not fear that it will go well or even if I am fit for the position. I am over qualified, however, I need this job.

I am going to over come the 'jitters' by:

-Preparing myself for the interview

-Listen to my favorite music

-Eat a hearty lunch-to make sure I am not hungry later

-Pick out my outfit

-Listen to more music

-Then right before I leave, look at myself in the mirror and say 'Your going to kick ass!' (as Rudi would put it)

Anyone else ever experience this? Share your thoughts with me.

(By the way, the interview went Ok. She told me she would call me within 2 weeks. Good luck for me.)

As I was searching the net I came across this article. Now, I know many men and women do not carry around a long list of what they are looking for in their special-someone. However, it might be a good idea to have a discussion with him or her before taking it to the next level in your relationship.

1. Money


2. Faith


3. Children


4. Sex


5. Career


6. Politics


7. In-Laws

Far too many relationships have ended based on these 7 topics. Communication is a huge part of making your relationships work.

Why not start before you tie the knot?

Take a closer look on how Darrell Causey describes how each one is 'must' in your decision making for your future. Click on the link below.

Article Source: http://ezinearticles.com/?Marriage--7-Topics-a-New-Couple-Must-Discuss&id=532775

Millions of people have been effected by this economic crisis. World wide we hear story-after- story of businesses closing after 25 years of service. Mama and Pa shops hanging signs offering 'Free Food-Going out of Business'. The pain this nation has been through can not be healed with a band aid. Lost homes, divorce, and people moving state to state. Everywhere we look someone knows someone close that has been hit by unemployment.

Us. We decided to move back to our home town in California at the wrong time. Even though it was the number one state with the highest unemployment rate at the time, we still were very optimistic about finding work. We knew of some friends and family with new jobs within this time, so why wouldn't it work for us? It didn't. Our checking and savings accounts were drained. Not only did we not have money to pay our bills, but we had no place of our own. Lucky we had family to open their houses to us.

As for our relationship-it got rocky. Without having any jobs, money, car, a place to call home, self esteem, you name it, it made a wedge between us. We still loved each other more than life itself. But we felt so worthless that no matter how much love we had, we were living in a nightmare that we couldn't see any light. After months of searching for jobs, hopping from house to house, and creating more debt, we moved back to Ohio. My husband's family paid for a huge moving truck and our way back home. His father even flew into town just to drive us back home.

They opened up their home to us. Love, compassion, and kindness. The love we felt from his parents was so strong- I never felt this way in my entire life! Tears of happiness and relief filled our eyes, for it had been months since we last saw them.

Here are some things I want to share that we did during our time to make sure our 'rocky' relationship went back to a 'healthy' relationship.

What we did to make our relationship work:

1. Communicate-we always made sure we spoke of our true emotion no matter what.


2. Loving words- my husband would give me a card everyday to make sure he never forgot how to express his love to me.


3. Positive Attitude- there were many low days and nights-but only one of us could be low that day. Then if he was down, I would pick him up by creating positive flow in his day.


4. Money-found odd jobs to create income when available. We received a lot of financial help through my in-laws--without it-we would probably would had to file for Bankruptcy.


5. Keep going- without a job it is easy to want to lay in bed all day. Get up and help a friend or family member. Let them know your broke, but they can pick you up if they would like your help.


6. Prayer- lots of prayers were put into place by us, family, friends, relatives, people we do not even know. God keep us safe.


7. Remember your wedding vows-we said 'I do' for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health. It was never 'if your rich, I will stay with you' or 'if your healthy, I will take care of you'. Go down memory lane with your spouse and relive that moment.

Since we have been here my husband found a custodial subbing job with a great school district. It is not a full-time job, however, he has worked three days so far! It is something that brings self-respect and making some money is better than nothing. I have a few prospects that I should find something out in the next couple of weeks. So keep counting your blessings and never give up. Give a helping help when you can and the favor will be returned!

Middle Name Calling

Isn't always funny that you know for sure that anyone who calls out the first & middle name of their child, of course in that serious tone, its means business! I have to say ... it works. Our two year old seemed to catch on pretty quick. It was passed down from generation to generation. 'The Middle Name Calling'. However, I remember being more scared than our two year old is when we say it. She thinks everything is a game. Sometimes even funny. Which, at her age, there really isn't anything that should be too serious.

I believe in discipline, therefore, there are some things I want her to learn. Teaching a child starts young. Very young. In everything I do, she will either echo what I say or copy the same action. I believe that by saying the 'middle' name gives the moment a serious ring to it. Pretty much saying "Mommy is speaking and I need your attention."

But I laughed inside when I found this quote, I had to share it! What was the middle name created for anyway?

Sunday Morning Church

Sunday morning church has been part of our lives from the moment we can't remember. As we were younger, we were use to being 'Entertained' while mommy and daddy got their fix. Once we got older and now married, we've been going to church off and on. Visited a couple of different churches. Maybe the people are nicer in one or the music is loud and booming in the other. But then you hit a few brick walls:

1. You do not want to go every Sunday.


2. You can not agree on the same church.


3. Do not want to go at all.


4. Your spouse gets up-set if you stay home.


5. You do not feel comfortable around the church people.


6. Or someone from that church hurt your feelings.

I can say my husband and I have agreed on a few items on this list several times. Sometimes we are off track from each other. One Sunday he wants to go and the next Sunday I want to go. It can become confusing sometimes to others or even your children, depending on their ages. The key ingredient is: Understanding. The more you know why, the more you understand. Instead of assuming he or she does not want to go for unknown reasons, for it is easy to get up-set.

Many times this topic can lead relationships into a big fight. For me, it would be because I would want to be there for the music, which sometimes can take over an hour. I do not like to be late and if I am, I get too nervous to even show up. My husband on the other hand, does not feel that he has to be there for everything. And many others feel the same way. The more we talk about our why's and why not's, the easier it is to prepare ourselves for that weekend.

Do not let 'church' become one big elephant in the room. Talk it out. Listen. And understand. Do not judge them for their decision making. Work out what you need to and next week will be 50% better.

Thinking About Buying Something?

Okay, just stop for one second. I know you want to make a very big decision right now and I am sure it will cause you to invest in some kind of money. Or maybe your new credit card you have been dying to use. I've been then and done it. You really don't have the money, nor do you plan on paying it off with your next pay check. Here is a small check list that you may want to consider first:

• Look at your checking accounts & savings


• Look over your monthly bills


• Have children--your going to need extra diapers, baby food, and clothes


• Check the oil in your car, it might be needing a change--that's more money


• How badly do you need it? Today, next month, or never?


• Do you have to get a loan from the bank or borrow money from a friend?


• Did you ask your spouse or significant other?

I know there are so many other things to consider. I hope you go over this checklist or make one of your own to make sure that whatever your next Big Item is, your not breaking the bank (unless its a home & your making a lot more money than your monthly bills added to this new mortgage), using credit you can not pay back, using your gas money, or anything else that can cause HUGE problems in your soon future.

Take your time and talk about it. Even walk away from it. I always hated it when a month later were sitting around the house with dog crap on the floor thinking, why did we spend $1,200.00 on this dog? And for something we didn't even need! Good luck!